Grief Support – Finding Hope & Strength for the Journey

Grief can leave us feeling disoriented—like we’ve been suddenly dropped into a strange and unfamiliar land, one we never chose to enter.

In these moments of loss, it can be deeply comforting to talk with someone who understands and can help give voice to what you’re feeling in this new reality.

If you would like to speak with the pastor for support, guidance, or simply a listening ear, please fill out the form below. We are here for you.

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Other Resources:

Help from the Bible

For Grieving Parents

Book Recommendations

 

The Words of Others on this Journey

You give yourself permission to grieve by recognizing the need for grieving. Grieving is the natural way of working through the loss of a love. Grieving is not weakness nor absence of faith. Grieving is as natural as crying when you are hurt, sleeping when you are tired or sneezing when your nose itches. It is nature’s way of healing a broken heart.
– Doug Manning

Mourning is one of the most profound human experiences that it is possible to have. The deep capacity to weep for the loss of a loved one and to continue to treasure the memory of that loss is one of our noblest human traits.  – Shneidman

“Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it.”
– Helen Keller

What we have once enjoyed deeply we can never lose.
All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.
– Helen Keller

“Ah. I smiled. I’m not really here to keep you from freaking out. I’m here to be with you while you freak out, or grieve or laugh or suffer or sing. It is a ministry of presence. It is showing up with a loving heart.”
― Kate Braestrup, Here If You Need Me: A True Story

“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but
the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach,
the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing.”
– C.S. Lewis

And once the storm is over you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won’t be the same person who walked in.

In the darkness there is always light, in the light there is always hope, in hope there is always love. Even though you may feel it, you are not alone.

Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone.”
― Fred Rogers

“In this sad world of ours sorrow comes to all and it often comes with bitter agony. Perfect relief is not possible except with time. You cannot now believe that you will ever feel better. But this is not true. You are sure to be happy again. Knowing this, truly believing it will make you less miserable now. I have had enough experience to make this statement.”
– Abraham Lincoln

“It is time to teach society on how to be empathetic with people grieving.”
Nathalie Himmelrich 

Grief is not a disorder, a disease or a sign of weakness. It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity, the price you pay for love. The only cure for grief is to grieve.
– Earl Grollman

When a person is born we rejoice, and when they’re married we jubilate, but when they die we try to pretend nothing has happened.
– Margaret Mead

J. William Worden’s Four Tasks of Mourning

Task I: To Accept the Reality of the Loss

Task II: To work through to the Pain of the Grief

Task III: To Adjust to a World Without the Deceased

Task IV: To Find an Enduring Connection With the Deceased in the Midst of
Embarking on a New Life

“You have to wear out your grief like an old suit, until it is threadbare.”

You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die, or when.
You can only decide how you’re going to live. Now.
– Joan Baez

Grief is in two parts. The first is loss. The second is the remaking of life.
– Anne Roiphe

Each of us are angels, with only one wing.
And we can only fly by embracing one another.
Luciano De Crescenzo

“Grief shared is grief diminished.”
– Rabbi Grollman

“This hole in my heart is in the shape of you, And no one else can fill it. Why would I want them to?”

 “When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions м — цена 600 грн в каталоге Спортивные штаны ✓ Купить женские вещи по доступной цене на Шафе , Nike, спортивные штаны, Украина #149859201, preview nike blazer low speed yellow, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.”    ~   Henri Nouwen

Sometimes it is OK if the only thing you did today was breathe.

“When someone you love dies, and you’re not expecting it, you don’t lose her all at once; you lose her in pieces over a long time—the way the mail stops coming,
and her scent fades from the pillows and even from the clothes in her closet and drawers. Gradually, you accumulate the parts of her that are gone.
Just when the day comes—when there’s a particular missing part that overwhelms you with the feeling that she’s gone, forever—there comes another day,
and another specifically missing part.”
– John Irving, A Prayer for Owen Meany

The Poets Speak

“There is no grief like the grief that does not speak”
– Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882)

“Every one can master a grief but he that has it”
– William Shakespeare (1564-1616)

“While grief is fresh, every attempt to divert only irritates. You must wait till it be digested, and then amusement will dissipate the remains of it.”
– Samuel Johnson (1709-1784)

“Only people who are capable of loving strongly can also suffer great sorrow, but this same necessity of loving serves to counteract their grief and heals them”.
– Leo Tolstoy (1828-1910)

“There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief… and unspeakable love.”
– Washington Irving

“The deeper that sorrow carves into your being the more joy you can contain. Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter’s oven?”
– Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931)

15 Things I Wish I’d Known About Grief

by Teryn O’Brien

1. You will feel like the world has ended. I promise, it hasn’t. Life will go on, slowly. A new normal will come, slowly.

2. No matter how bad a day feels, it is only a day.  When you go to sleep crying, you will wake up to a new day.

3. Grief comes in waves. You might be okay one hour, not okay the next. Okay one day, not okay the next day. Okay one month, not okay the next. Learn to go with the flow of what your heart and mind are feeling.

4. It’s okay to cry. Do it often. But it’s okay to laugh, too. Don’t feel guilty for feeling positive emotions even when dealing with loss.

5. Take care of yourself, even if you don’t feel like it. Eat healthily. Work out. Do the things you love. Remember that you are still living.

6. Don’t shut people out. Don’t cut yourself off from relationships. You will hurt yourself and others.

7. No one will respond perfectly to your grief. People–even people you love–will let you down. Friends you thought would be there won’t be there, and people you hardly know will reach out. Be prepared to give others grace. Be prepared to work through hurt and forgiveness at others’ reactions.

8. God will be there for you perfectly. He will never, ever let you down. He will let you scream, cry, and question. Throw all your emotions at Him. He is near to the brokenhearted.

9. Take time to truly remember the person you lost. Write about him or her, go back to all your memories with them, truly soak in all the good times you had with that person. It will help.

10. Facing the grief is better than running. Don’t hide from the pain. If you do, it will fester and grow and consume you.

11. You will ask “Why?” more times than you thought possible, but you may never get an answer. What helps is asking, “How? How can I live life more fully to honor my loved one? How can I love better, how can I embrace others, how can I change and grow because of this?” 

12. You will try to escape grief by getting busy, busy, busy. You will think that if you don’t think about it, it’ll just go away. This isn’t really true. Take time to process and heal.

13. Liquor, sex, drugs, hobbies, work, relationships, etc., will not take the pain away. If you are using anything to try and numb the pain, it will make things worse in the long run. Seek help if you’re dealing with the sorrow in unhealthy ways.

14. It’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to need people. It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s okay.

15. Grief can be beautiful and deep and profound. Don’t be afraid of it. Walk alongside it. You may be surprised at what grief can teach you.

“Everything I Needed to Know I learned at my Grief Support Group.”

by Rev. Dr. Rich Knight

  1. The power of shared experience means that the people who will be most helpful to you are those who’ve been through it.
  2. Good-hearted people will try to take your grief away. “At least you had your mother for all those years.”
  3. Good-hearted people will say the dumbest things. “I know just how you feel, I lost my pet hamster last week.”
  4. Life will not feel safe for a while, like living on an earthquake fault line, expecting something bad to happen at any time.
  5. People often hit emotional valleys in 3-month intervals.
  6. People can get stuck or mired down in one of the emotions of grief for a long time. Especially anger and depression. Often anger gets directed or channeled at someone – ex. doctor, nursing home, funeral director, pastor, etc.
  7. The week leading up to an anniversary/holiday/birthday is often more difficult than the day itself.
  8. In the early months, grief is like the stock market in decline, in a “bear” market. It usually gets worse before it gets better.
  9. Farther along, the journey of grief is like the stock market ascending in a “bull” market. There are still dips but they aren’t quite as deep or frequent.
  10. Grief ripples through life.
  11. A number of people speak of “signs” from their loved ones, even visitations.
  12. Faith air jordan 31 xxx1 and a faith community are invaluable resources.

Recommended Books:

Coach Yourself Through Grief
by Dr. Don Eisenhauer

Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations for Working through Grief
by Martha Whitmore Hickman

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